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What is Queer and Are you One?

Amanda Valentine Dela Cruz

A lot of the articles in My Transsexual Date revolves around the life of transgender women and the men they date. However, transgender individuals are still part of the LGBTQIA community and it’s only fitting to introduce one of the spectrums to My Transsexual Date’s audience.

Today, you’re going to find out if the word queer’s definition and everything that encompasses it. Please know that this guide wasn’t created to offend a group of people. This was made for educational purposes only.

What does Queer mean?

The word queer describes a lot of individuals who don’t want to be associated with the words straight and cisgender.

Lesbian, bisexual, gay, and transgender individuals may refer to themselves as queer.

It may also be used by people who have a more complicated identity when it comes to their sexuality or gender.

They’re the ones who may change their position in the spectrum from time to time. It’s not as if they’re undecided of their identity but a shift in sexuality and gender is sometimes inevitable and it’s not something out of the norm.

a transgender men

Are Transgender and Queer the same?

a queer

A trans person can be transgender and queer at the same time but two words are not synonymous.

For example, a transgender woman may identify as a heterosexual woman while the other, choose to be queer because she’s not straight or she just doesn’t like associating herself with the common sexual identities.

Are Queers Pansexuals?

pansexuals people

This gets more confusing because both spectrums can cross each others’ paths from time to time. Pansexuals are people who are sexually attracted to everyone no matter the sexual orientation or gender identity. However, not all queers are open to having sex with anyone because as mentioned before, there’s a chance that their sexual identities or gender identities may undergo a shift from time to time.

Who can you call Queer then?

Queer has a sad history because it was used as a derogatory term towards people with an alternative sexual orientation. However, today, the word queer is proudly worn as a badge by a lot of people in the LGBTQIA community.

If you’re not part of the community, please don’t use this word. Added to that, just because you’re part of the LGBTQIA community, it doesn’t give you the right to call anyone queer without asking for their permission first.

Don’t use the word queer loosely if you don’t want to offend anyone.

Am I Queer?

two gay guys

If you strongly believe that you’re not a cisgender person and you’re not heterosexual, you’re queer.

If you feel that you don’t fit the other spectrums of the LGBTQIA community, you may refer to yourself as queer.

Is it hard to find a relationship if I’m Queer?

two lesbian women

Being queer is not a hindrance to finding love. Yes, there are transgender women who only prefer to be with heterosexual cisgender men, but this doesn’t mean that there’s no trans woman out there for you. True love doesn’t see labels, orientations, and identities.

If you truly believe that you’re capable of giving and receiving love, your spectrum in the LGBTQIA doesn’t matter.

Why does the majority find it hard to understand Queer’s definition?

hands with a rainbow

Just like the gender non-conformist, queer has spectrums under it. Both are not as easy to define as lesbian, gay, bisexual, pansexual, and transgender.

For you to cut the explanation short, you can simply say that you don’t find yourself to be either cisgender or straight.

Doing so will close the doors for further questions (unless the person you’re talking to keeps pushing your buttons).

Do queers experience discrimination too?

Everyone in the LGBTQIA community experiences discrimination.

Just the mere mention of an alternative sexual orientation may ruffle some feathers.

Being queer doesn’t give you a pass because it’s an umbrella term. In reality, queers get a lot of flak because some people don’t believe that queers are labeled “correctly”.

A lot of people think that gender identities and sexual orientations are black and white.

What they fail to realize is both categories can be divided into sub-categories, hence the rainbow flag of the LGBTQIA community.

a guy

Other Spectrums of the LGBTQIA community

For you to have a better understanding of how to differentiate queer from other spectrums, listed below are the other spectrums and their definitions.

Lesbian

two lesbians

Lesbians are women (cisgender or transgender) who are sexually attracted to women. The majority of them exclusively date and have sex with women. There are many types of lesbians. Some of them are lipstick lesbians (women who dress up in a feminine way), butch lesbians (women who dress in a more masculine way), and the one in between.

Lesbians also sometimes call themselves gay but since we’re talking about the LGBTQIA spectrum, let’s move on to the meaning of G in the acronym.

Gay (Gay Men)

two gay men

Gays are men (cisgender or transgender) who are sexually gravitated towards men.

The majority of them only date and have sex with men.

Gays dress up differently. Some of them dress up and act in a very masculine way while others are called effeminate.

They’re the ones who still look like men but act and dress up with a feminine touch.

Bisexuals

an bisexual person

Bisexuals can either be transgender or cisgender. They’re attracted to both men and women. The way they dress up and act is more varied because they represent all gender identities. Bisexuality is more on the section of sexual orientation rather than gender identity.

However, they’re only attracted to men and women and not other genders that gender non-conformists and queers identify with. Some of them even only prefer cisgender people and they’re not attracted to transgender individuals.

Transgender

an transgender person

Transgender people are the ones who transition to the opposite gender that they’ve been assigned at birth.

They dress up, talk, and act like the gender that they identify with and it’s mostly either a man or a woman.

Intersex

an intersex person

Intersexed people are the ones who are born with conditions regarding their reproductive system or sexual anatomy. For example, an individual might be born appearing to be female on the outside, but having mostly male-typical anatomy on the inside.

This has more to do with their “unusual” genetic condition. The reason why they’re included in the rainbow is that they’re often misunderstood and harassed for being born the way they are.

Asexual

Asexual people are not attracted to anyone sexually. They may still feel attracted to a person emotionally, but never in a sexual way.

Now that you’re aware of the other spectrums, you’ll be able to easily differentiate as to why queer isn’t synonymous with any of them. Did you learn anything from this What is Queer and Are you One guide? If so, please share it on your timeline.

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About the author

Amanda Valentine Dela Cruz
Just a random ladyboy playing with makeup and skincare. Loves bacon and the operating table. I'm also the author of the dating guide book Dating Transgender Women for Gentlemen. Know more -> dtwfgbook.com

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